That's as far as I can get into my defense of evo-psyche, tho'.I can't sign on to it, because of lines like this (ALSO from the Evo-psyche wiki page) DIT is a "middle-ground" between much of social science, which views culture as the primary cause of human behavioral variation, and human sociobiology and evolutionary psychology which view culture as an insignificant by-product of genetic selection.
Friday, April 6, 2012
Thursday, December 15, 2011
|I brought the support; she brought the sexy.|
Oh, hey, the comic was pretty good too. :D Very pretty, and pretty funny. Although you'll get the jokes better if you actually play the game. You do play Kingdom of Loathing, don't you?
Saturday, December 10, 2011
|Have a nice day! You selfish ass.|
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
|I should've been a political cartoonist! Except every cartoon would just be this picture with the text changed.|
Friday, November 25, 2011
An Essay on The Societal Dominatrix Part 5. Fear of the Submissive Man (or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Domme)
Many social structures have made allowances for men to sleep with men within the right narrative. ‘Proper’ homosexuality is occasionally to control submissive males. There were the Spartans, men so manly that they needed other men to be their women. The Spartans practiced a rigorous, infant-scrutinizing eugenics program, routinely terrorized their helot serf/slaves, and in addition to making their wives cross-dress , captured their brides and locked them away to be constantly watched by a bridesmaid. What did all these things have to do with each other? Maybe nothing. Or maybe there’s the fact that Spartan women, with all the free time away from Spartan men, were known to romp with helots.1 On long war campaigns it wasn’t unknown for Spartans to come home to entire generations of half-grown nothoi (children of slaves and citizens) living in their homes. (Note: The half-breed offspring of helot women and Spartan men were just A-Ok, generally living as Periokoi – non-citcizen free men)
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
An Essay on The Societal Dominatrix- Part 4. Loving and Hating The Dominatrix (or Are You a Good Witch, or a Bad Witch?)
|Soul Caliber titles – Ivy Valentine – A virgin who is malcontent with her status as a corrupted being. She labors to find a way to expunge herself of evil and refuses to have intercourse lest she procreate said evil.|
|Various Batman Titles – Cat Woman – Largely only interested in Batman, a man who is a more powerful person than she is, whom routinely defeated her when she was villainess and largely rebukes and chastises her during her anti-hero phases.|
|Various Batman Titles – Poison Ivy – (this one’s even a stretch to include, Ivy’s largely been more of a pure temptress) Virginal, her touch killing anyone she contacts.|
|Red Sonja’s Red Sonja- Virginal. The prize of her sexual favor is contingent on a man defeating her in fair combat, or she will lose all of her Goddess-granted power.|
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
|Do I have to explain this one?|
|From Left to Right: Dracula, Freddy Krueger, Pinhead,|
Pyramid Head, Frankenstein's Monster, Jason Voorhees
Monday, November 21, 2011
An Essay on The Societal Dominatrix- Part 2. The Herstory of the Dominatrix (or Education is Awesome for More Reasons Than You Think.)
|The Evolution of the Dominatrix|
Sunday, November 20, 2011
An Essay on The Societal Dominatrix- Part 1. The Introduction (or Quiet Riot Girl Said a Thing on the Internet)
|The Patriarchy, Feminism, and The Dominatrix|
Friday, November 18, 2011
Domination in a healthy, committed relationship is a difficult concept to delineate. If I tell Jay to do something, am I being dominant, or just pushy? If I don't want to do the laundry and I force him into doing it, am I reinforcing our consensual domme/sub relationship, or merely taking advantage of him to enable my laziness? When Jay and I get into an argument, rare as that seems to be these days, I do not automagically win just because I wear the strap-on in the relationship. If I treat him genuinely poorly and he objects to it, I can't just use the cop out of scolding him for being a bad sub and always get my way. Domination isn't a position of power, it's a position of trust. When I have him tied to the bed, he has to trust that I will make the right decisions about his well being, both emotional and physical. Submissives, by their very nature, are very easy to hurt. They've put trust into their dom/domme and that trust can be so easily lost or broken and it's a damn hard job getting it back.
But wait, I just said domination isn't a position of power. Isn't it? Oh, I get to order him around, step on him as it suits my fancy, force him down to the bed and tell him how to please me, but he has boundaries that I have to respect and I have to communicate with him. You can't just walk into the room with your sub and then yell at him when he doesn't know what it is that you want. If I tell Jay to feed me and he makes fettuccine alfredo when I was in the mood for baked chicken, he hasn't disobeyed me. He may have displeased me, but he hasn't disobeyed and if I don't communicate my wishes to him, I can't hold him accountable for not fulfilling them. Now, obviously, there are lots of little things that I don't have to say because he and I have been together for almost 10 years now. He knows I don't like for my cheese to touch my mayo on sandwiches, but he still usually asks how I want my sandwich done because I am particular about it. He knows I don't like for my breasts to be sucked hard anywhere except the nipples, so if he does that wrong than I am free to discipline him for the slip-up. But by and large, if I don't communicate to him what I want, than I have failed to dominate him, he hasn't failed to submit to me.
There are things I don't and won't do as a domme. I don't physically dominate him in front of other people whatsoever because it embarrasses him. I'm not the psychological/humiliation type of domme and he is definitely not that type of sub. Because of his history of abuse and bullying at the hands of his peers, it's not a fun sexual game to him, it's just more meanness. I avoid being mean to Jay because he is, far and above being my sub, my partner. My mate. My other half. He's not my pet or my slave as the primary delineation of our relationship, that is simply our private play and enjoyment. He is a human being first and my plaything a distant third to fourth. When I cross a line, he tells me I've done so. That isn't him acting out of hand as a sub, and me allowing him that freedom isn't me being a lax domme. It's human dignity. When he calls me on something, I back off and jot that down in my little mental list of boundaries.
Whenever I talk to people about having boundaries in a relationship, they go one of two ways. Either a relationship should be so perfect that you should never have to put anything into the “off limits” category, or they feel that openly talking about what you like and what you don't like takes all the mystery and romance out of a relationship. I can see both perspectives, and in my crazier days I have ascribed to both schools. But it's not about writing down a list or rules or just obeying whatever the other person says. Communication is a beautiful and very necessary thing in all relationships. When you put on your turning signal while you are driving, you are communicating to the people around you your intentions, and this communication makes everyone a little bit safer and a little more aware and understanding of each other. Without that communication, when you swerve into my lane I don't know if you've fallen asleep and are drifting, suddenly spilled coffee in your lap and are apt to do some more crazy shit while dealing with it, or if you were just changing lanes. Communication establishes expectations and understanding, both of which – when reasonable and sane – help to facilitate a good relationship and a comfortable foundation from which to build on.